Duty hours 2.......

Hmmmm........ok chalo finally i give up ,after much of thought i have decided to repeat one of the posts ,i was being persuaded hard enough to share few of my experiences once more ,so finally once again i am here ,well story telling was never the idea behind this blog's germination but sometimes for friends its all worth of....but this time around let's take the look behind that ugly ,money minting face{well this is how people think of us } of your doc....well few of the encounters here are of special interest to my good friend abhishek, or lets be frank and say our interest abhishek......

MOUNTAIN DEW -u can take it from aboral end also !

It was a reagular day at casualty ,screaming ,shouting ,that adrenaline rush gushing thro'ur blood ,i was busy completing all the police cases ,but amidst that crowd i could sense two eyes fixed on me ,i found two men in early 20's standing in the corner looking helplessly at me "haanji kya baat hai ,batao ?" enquired me ,"sir kuch private baat hai ,aap free ho jao we will talk later "came the answer ,well after a couple of hours they again came back to me .....i had no idea what was about to come .....
bolo kya baat hai ?was my question .one of the guy replied "sir for the past two days i was having a upset stomach ,it was very bad ,none of the pills helped me ,so in frustation and anger i decided to close the way out {me eyes were fixed on him ,trying to anticipate whats next ?he continued ,sir plz sun lene gussa mat hona ,i was like yes go ahead ,here came the shocker ....so sir to get rid of all the suffering i closed the way out by a small 'itra'bottle
' ,i was like whatttt!!crap where its now ?he replied it went inside ..."i shouted get the iv fluids ready ,gimme a PR set ...the moment i examined his interiors ,i screamed whom you are trying to befool its a much bigger bottle its not 'itra bottle'speak the truth or we wont be able to help you out ....he stuck to his version ,after stablising his vitals we shifted him for x -ray ....technician brought the x-ray to me in ten minutes with his mouth wide open like ajanta cave ,i asked ,what ?he was like " sir ek baar ye x -ray dekho ,kya hai ye " one look on that and i said man its a cold drink bottle ,and by the outline one can guess its mountain dew ,is this guy nuts ? what the heck he was doing ?i rushed to him and said "this is ur final chance either tell us the truth of face the music "he confessed ...he was a gay and the bottle was his regular pleasure tool ,this time around he messed up ...."yaar itni si baat thi pehle bolna tha ,being a medico we understand its perfectly ok to be what you are ,things are not in ur control ,u r made like this only ,but relax we will fix this bottle mess "

minutes later he violently tried to move ,the bottle perforated his anal canal ,his abdomen was opened in the ER OT ,to take the bottle out APR performed ,he is healthy now ....
{i really want to put a copy of that x-ray here ,but dont want to put that precious and rare treasure to be kept open for grabs on net ,any body wanna have a look let me know }....


Jack and jill went up the hill ,i dont know what they did up there ,but jill came shouting ...."i pill" i pill......

well medically it's a wonder drug for the control of unwanted pregnancy ,but it's the widely abused drug these days ,without knowing the side effects people keep on popping it like a candy and when things go wrong it becomes one's worst nightmare ....
take this into account ,once i had this patient with complaints of weakness ,pain abdomen ,for the last few days ,she was a young educated lady working in a good organisation ,after her check up i found her low on haemoglobin ,i tried to find out the cause of blood loss and the answer in all senses tested my level of calmness ,she had popped 7 i-pill in the last 10 days and which disturbed her hormanl balance so badly that she lost that amount of blood .....needless to ask her about her marital status ,i turned to the dude escorting her or say "ladies man"as few gals like to call jerks like him ,"sir do you know the cause of her ailments ,he replied ,yupp i know call anybody take how much money you want ,but make my girl friend well and take me out of it "i smiled and sarcastically replied boss if you are smart enough to have unprotected sex than you must be smarter enough to fix this out ...{he was an MBA,but he forgot the economics of a 17 rs latex over 90 odd rs i-pill} but i am sure his medical bill that day will help him remember this lifelong ........

Hospital and hospitality

yupp with the sudden surge in the number of corporate hospitals there is a fast growing speculation that whether these place are a place for treatment or money minting hub ,sometimes care takes over cure at these places ....i had this old fellow once in the ER ,in the middle of his treatment he called me up and asked hey doc ,which DEO you use ?i was like sir this is none of your concern ,meet me outside i will tell you all ,but not here .....later i came to know he was a friend of my HOD ,and he reverted back to him with the report that the DOC'S medical expertise were good {touch wood !}but with his sharp cut cotton pants and razor sharp crew cut hair ,he should be more open and personal with the patients ,this will take that lad to places...well i am still confused when did they taught me in medical school to share my personal life with patient.......all that i have learnt is the cure and affection ......


There are endless stories which could find its place here ,but i cant go on blah ..blah...blah....legends are numerous in the practice of medicine ....but its time again to say sayonara ...thankx to the rare leisure i get during my night shifts i am able to finish this post ....good or bad i dont know ,even if its pathetic who cares .....for more lets meet over a beer ....
cheers ....hic ! hic!